Where There is Pain, There is Wisdom…

I’ve gotta say, I think the most painful part of growing up is getting your wisdom teeth.

My first three sets were perfectly fine to come through, a bit uncomfortable, but nothing special.¬†However my last set is coming through at the moment, and with the gum ripping fun I have managed to get an infection. And with my luck, it’s not just a normal infection; it’s the kind of infection that needs hardcore antibiotics, which if used for longer than a few days then you can get a hairy tongue or other disgusting side effects.

So I want to know, with all this pain, where is my wisdom? Will it arrive one day in the mail with an ‘if undelivered please return to the wisdom fairy’ sticker on the back? It may look like junk mail, that many people throw away. It could say ‘CONGRATULATIONS! You’ve got wisdom!’ and tell you that if you respond within 30 days, you will get a free gift thrown in; I’m hoping for a high street gift voucher.

But too much wisdom at one time could overload my mind, so it would probably need to be split up into smaller portions so that my brain could handle the extra wisdom; it isn’t a very complex brain anyway so it’s better to ease it in rather than force a whole load of information in there.

It could be in the form of a monthly voucher that I can claim by putting it under my pillow at night. Then the wisdom fairy will download it right into my brain as I sleep. I can wake up in the morning feeling refreshed, energised and finally being able to recall pi to 50 decimal places; sadly I can only recall it to 10 decimal places as of this moment (3.1415926535).

Now some people might be sceptical and say that you don’t get any wisdom from growing extra teeth, it’s just a name given to them because of when they begin to grow (when you are wiser than a child). But why would you be forced to go through such pain and discomfort if there is nothing good to look forward to at the end of it. However those sceptics are obviously wrong, and probably don’t believe in the tooth fairy either!

I’ll keep you all updated on whether I get my extra wisdom or not. But for now, I’m going to go sit in front of my letterbox and wait patiently, with my antibiotics, for my letter or voucher from the wisdom fairy.

If anyone else has either gotten their wisdom, or has any theories on how it will arrive then please let me know, by either commenting on this blog post, or adding me on Facebook/Twitter.

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